Mommy Zoro
by one piece girl 99999
Summary: Zoro takes a crack a being a mom to his own children. AU,Rated T just in case. This is a song-fic to 'Mr.Mom' By Lonestar


**Hey guys! This is my first song-fic. I was listening to the song 'Mr. Mom' by Lonestar when I got the idea for this story. I know I should be working on my story, Miura D. Storm, but I am having writers block right now for that story. I apologize to anyone who is reading the story and promise that the next chapter will be out soon. So anyway please enjoy! Remember to R&R!**

Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece, the song 'Mr. Mom', or McDonalds. (I put that one in there just in case.)

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Mommy Zoro

_**Lost my job, came home mad  
Got a hug and kiss and that's too bad  
She said I can go to work until you find another job I thought I like the sound of that  
Watch TV and take long naps  
Go from a hard working dad to being Mr. Mom**_

Zoro slammed the door as he came in. He walked in to see his family sitting at the dinner table with their heads turned towards him. He noticed a spot at the head of where he always sits and gave a light smile. He looked at his family before turning to hang up his coat.

There was Robin his wife, who was a stay at home mom and the mother of his kids. Sanji his oldest son at age ten, Nami his only daughter and the second oldest was eight, Usopp his second son was the third oldest and six and a half, and last but not least his youngest, Luffy, who was five.

"Daddy!" Luffy yelled and hugged him as he came to sit down at his table.

"What wrong you seem to be spacing out." Robin asked her husband.

Zoro looked over all the worrying faces at the table.

"I… Was fired today." He looked down in shame.

Next thing he knew he was being hugged by Usopp and Luffy, Getting a kiss on the cheak from Nami, and a 'That really sucks' from Sanji.

When that was finished and dinner was over Robin walked over and grabbed his hand.

"I can go to work until you find a job."

Zoro nodded and thought '_This won't be that bad I can just watch TV and take a few naps and anything else I want.'_

Zoro soon went to bed thinking he was going to relax all day tomorrow.

He was _so _wrong.

_**Well  
Pampers melt in a Maytag dryer  
Crayons go up one drawer higher  
Rewind Barney for the fifteenth time  
Breakfast six, naps at nine**_

"Why was there a diaper in the dryer?" Zoro asked Luffy while staring at the now melted diaper in their new Maytag dryer.

"'Cause daddy, Usopp said when you put a diaper in the dryer it blows up and I wanted it see it go BOOM!" He yelled at the end.

Zoro sent Luffy up stairs while he cleaned the dryer. And when he went up stairs he found a surprise.

Drawings in every color of the rainbow were all over everything. The walls, the floor, the dining room table, and he looked up. No they weren't on the ceiling but on the ceiling fan.

"How in the world?"

He heard giggling and followed it down the hall. He saw Luffy drawing a picture on his and Robin's bedroom door.

It had a green stick figure with 'daddy' underneath written with a backwards 'a'. The next was a purple stick figure with 'mommy' written underneath. He saw Luffy had drawn Sanji in blue, Nami in orange, Usopp in pink, himself in red, and even their dog, Chopper, in pink.

He took the crayons from Luffy and put them up in a higher drawer before sending Luffy to go play with his sister because Nami wanted someone to dress up.

Zoro came out into the living room to find Usopp crying.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Usopp didn't answer, he just kept crying. Sanji was close by at the time decided to help his dad out.

"You need to rewind Barney again. I don't know how to do it only mom and Nami know. If you rewind it this will be the fifteenth time he's watched it today.

Zoro rewound Barney and sat down in his chair. Robin woke him up before she left and had breakfast ready for the kids and him. All by six then she left for the whole day. At around nine o'clock everyone was asleep with a nap until they got up at ten.

_**There's bubble gum in the baby's hair  
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair  
Been crazy all day long and it's only Monday  
Mr. Mom**_

"I said sorry dad. I was just chewing gum when it popped out of my mouth and into Luffy's hair when we were playing dress up." Nami told her dad with tears streaming down her face.

"It's okay I just need to give Luffy a bath." And during the bath Zoro swore he got wetter than Luffy. Geez, the kid just can't sit still.

Luffy ran off with Nami as soon as he was out of the bath because he wanted her to read him a story. While Usopp sat next to Sanji in their dad's chair eating sliced sweet potatoes left over from last night's dinner. Unfortunately they got it all over the chair causing them to both take off running to Sanji's room.

They didn't dare go into Nami's room and Luffy and Usopp's room was a mess.

When Zoro found the mess he just sighed and cleaned it off to the best of his ability, meaning it was done horribly.

"I can't believe it's only Monday."

_**Football, soccer and ballet**_  
_**Squeeze in Scouts and PTA**_  
_**And there's that shopping list she left**_  
_**That's seven pages long**_

All of them loaded up into Zoro's vehicle. Zoro had just found out that they all had something to do tonight. Sanji had soccer practice, Nami had ballet, Luffy had football practice, and Usopp had a Boy Scout meeting. Even Zoro had something to do. He had to go to a PTA meeting. He didn't even know what that was.

And after all that was done Zoro took everyone to the store with him so he could get what was on his list. The trip took a turn for the worst when Luffy and Usopp ran up and down the aisle off toys, Sanji disappeared somewhere, and Nami was trying to pick people's pockets as they walked by.

_**How much smoke can one stove make  
The kids won't eat my charcoal cake  
It's more than any man can take  
Being Mr. Mom**_

They kids wanted something to eat so Zoro tried making a cake. The key word here is _tried_. He had no idea what he was doing. Enough smoke came out of the stove to set off the fire alarm and even worry the neighbor's enough to call the fire department. Which they did but that doesn't matter right now. All four kids even Luffy, the human garbage disposal, wouldn't eat Zoro black charcoal cake. Zoro rubbed his temples frowning at the pounding headache he has had since this morning.

_**Well  
Pampers melt in a Maytag dryer  
Crayons go up one drawer higher  
Rewind Barney for the sixteenth time  
Breakfast six, naps at nine**_

Luffy put another diaper in the dryer claiming that it wasn't him when Zoro watched him do it. Luffy and Usopp somehow got the crayons down and began coloring all over the place and Zoro had to rewind Barney again since Nami was standing in the corner for throwing a temper tantrum. He would have to make dinner soon. Okay scratch that. He would go get McDonalds.

_**There's bubble gum in the baby's hair  
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair  
Been crazy all day long and it's only Monday  
Mr. Mom**_

"Why do you all have bubble gum in your hair?"

"Well we sort of had a contest to see who could blow the biggest bubble and all of the bubble's ended up popping." Sanji explained to his dad.

"Okay well you all need a bath anyways and Luffy you need another one."

While the kids were in the bath he looked at his chair which was still covered in smashed sweet potatoes and sighed.

"How can it only be Monday?" He asked no one.

_**Before I fall in bed tonight  
If the dog didn't eat the classifieds  
I'm gonna look just one more time**_

Zoro looked towards his bedroom wanting oh so badly to go to sleep. He still had to make sure everything was done and that Chopper was put in his kennel so he wouldn't tare anything up. He went through his list one more time.

_**'Cause**_  
_**Pampers melt in a Maytag dryer**_  
_**Crayons go up one drawer higher**_  
_**Rewind Barney for the eighteenth time**_  
_**Breakfast six, naps at nine**_  
_**There's bubble gum in the baby's hair**_  
_**Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair**_  
_**Been crazy all day long**_  
_**Oh been crazy all day long and it's only Monday**_  
_**Mr. Mom**_

"Okay. I figured out that diaper's melt in the dryer, to keep the crayons away from Luffy, I gotta find a way to get used to Barney, they eat breakfast way to early and take a nap when they should still be asleep, don't leave the kids alone with gum, and don't let them eat on the furniture. Yep it's official I have had a crazy day."

**_Balancin' checkbooks, juggling bills_**  
**_Thought there was nothing to it_**  
**_Baby, now I know how you feel_**  
**_What I don't know is how you do it_**

"Okay… so here's the receipt from the grocery store and I wrote a check to pay for Nami's dance classes and…" He was lost right now. Robin always took care of the checkbook and the bills.

"What's this?" He said when he noticed that the mail was setting on the counter. It was a bill. Actually more bills.

"Great I have to start over again." When he finished he noticed the house was a mess and went to at least clean a little so Robin wouldn't have to. Zoro froze when he realized this was how Robin had to feel every day.

"How does she do it?" Zoro asked himself

Robin walked in through the door just as Zoro finished cleaning and straitening up the house. Robin smiled when she saw him sitting at the table with his head down. She nudged him a bit and looked up. He had a completely exhausted look on his face.

"_**Honey, you're my hero.**__" _He whimpered pathetically before falling asleep right there.

'I hope he's ready for tomorrow.' Robin thought as she giggled at her husband's limp form.


End file.
